Unwanted materials that are generated in the course of our daily chores always end up in the dustbin. Similarly, as events, men and matters get churned in the cauldron of politics, quite a volume of wastes gets piled up. In India there is only one dumping ground to cast away such political discards and it is- yes, you guessed it- the Third Front, described variously at various times as National Front, United Front etc, etc.
This political dustbin in a way creates itself and then survives for a short period, owing probably to some biological law similar to the one that allows weeds to grow and proliferate. And much like the fate of those troublesome plants, the contents of the political dustbin are promptly decimated when their true worth or lack of it, becomes explicit.
The third fronts are usually just a name or a label and their contents are as vague as vague alone could be. They are like a roadside charity choultry in which politicians and parties relax for brief periods before achieving either greatness or ignominious destruction, though going by current trends it is always the latter fate that befalls these political nomads.
The constituents of the front range from the infant outfits that had strayed away from the parent, prodigals biding their time for a homecoming which is not yet forthcoming or partnerless parties in search of marriages of convenience to stage just a one-night-stand. They either bid a friendly goodbye and go their own ways if they are defeated or bicker and then go their own ways if voted to power through some freak accident. Either way these third fronts are doomed to collapse from within and are as transient as soap bubbles.
There are certain permanent members of this impermanent set up. For instance, the left out Leftists have always been the brain(?) behind most of these hotch potch arrangements. Like many of their avowed principles, these fronts too take off from their imagination for these red-lettered intellectuals have little else to do than sit idly and brood.
There is neither layoffs nor strikes in the devil’s workshops that abound in the left circles, as they constantly theorise and reel out surmises and conjectures on what ails our economy and polity. They never realise that their own onward march is halting and tentative because it resembles more the gait of a lame man who keeps saying left, left and sternly refuses to put the other foot down.
It is this proclivity to always put the left foot, which is not necessarily the best, forward to block growth and governance that has made dealing with them a bit difficult and frustrating, even as they languish in the realms of impracticality, blissfully unaware of what is going on around. Little wonder that fronts keep popping up from their cupboards so often.
So it is in one such workshop, aptly described as ‘con’clave, that took place in Chennai that the bearded oracle called Surjeet propounded this bright idea of a third front for the umpteenth time. The other Left under whose auspices the conference was being held pounced on the idea as it saw in it something newsworthy that the media would like to lap up in the otherwise dour and dull proceedings. The plan has now caught on like wildfire with the other combustible wastes lying littered around in the TN political land
Cape also getting inflamed by the spark. For the DMK, which just got rejected by the BJP, it has come in handy as a fresh towel, both to hide and remove the mud from their face. One sitting with Surjeet, and lo, Karunanidhi suddenly is back to his secular self after being temporarily led down the ‘communal’ path by the BJP.
Now the rational thalaivan is as wise and repentant as the fox that found the grapes a bit sour as it could not reach them. A couple of more tete-a-tetes with a few other comrades have ensured that Karunanidhi remains secular, whatever that means, and all his surreptitious winks and not so subtle advances towards the BJP have been forgiven.
If Karunanidhi is around, can Moopanar be far behind? After tapping the Congress doors for months together now and getting only his knuckles bruised, the TMC leader has also expressed solidarity with the very fluid, yet-to-be born outfit. He now even claims that he was indeed taken into confidence on this very novel scheme by the Leftists much earlier and that he had been ‘chewing’ on such an idea himself for quite some time now.
However, he hastens to add that though he would be happy to attend the launch, he would do so only ‘if invited’. Surely, because, the self respecting man that he is, he is unlikely to go uninvited as his luck with invitations have been rather dismal of late. Neither his ally DMK nor the parent Congress seem to be even remotely aware of the TMC’s existence. Pretty nice of Surjeet and comrades to have remembered him and Moopanar is visibly grateful. The invite too would come as it takes at least three to form a Front!
There are also a few other likely members of the proposed third affront, the first two being the National and United ones. There is the casteist but secular Morcha of Mulayam and Laloo which has reportedly expressed its willingness to play ball, as if they had a choice.
A few Butas here and there may also throw their hat into the circus ring and come October, the nation will once again witness the familiar sight of an assortment of leaders holding one another’s hands and raising them in yet another display of shortlived solidarity. Should we put up with this comedy anymore? Surely not, for this is one history which has been repeating itself very often and the people are too tired to even tickle themselves to laugh!
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