‘Never test the tooth of a gift cow’, goes an old Tamil truism. The adage has an English parallel, similar almost to every syllable, save the subject of gift: ‘Do not look a gift horse in the mouth’. Such injunctions are inspired by considerations of courtesy and civility. The assumption is that a ‘gift’ being a voluntary ‘act or instance of giving’, does not involve a quid pro quo and therefore merits mute acceptance. So, demanding that the donor demonstrate the durability of the gift or the lack of defect in it is indeed bad manners.
Pure gifts are passe. Or rare, in these material times whence everyone is obliged to everyone else and is under compulsion to reciprocate. The pre-condition of ‘absence of quid pro quo’ has gone for a toss. Even with family and friends, where love & loyalty are supposed to rule, ‘exchange of gifts’ happen, more or less as an emotional compulsion. Still, it is passable despite the irony for it is the gesture and not the gift that matters most. If still, ‘testing of the cow’s tooth’ occurs, it is not the gift, but the relationship itself that comes under question. But if we are to leave the loved ones out of the loop, the gift scheme of things really looks muddled even otherwise.
‘Gift’ in its undiluted usage has a lofty connotation. ‘An exceptionally talented or intelligent person’ is referred to as ‘gifted’. The act of giving, without a sense of superiority and sans expectations, but out of sheer love, is hailed as a virtue by all cultures. Many faiths decipher the presence of God through the presents He bestows; no presents means He is absent, not just to an atheist but also to the believer. Children are thought of as Gifts of God, even though the spouse who is a partner in the project may sometimes be deemed a curse. But today the fairname of ‘gift’ stands sullied. It now has a wide ambit and can mean many things, making the very term take on a derogatory tone, far from the idea of goodness associated with it. Well, ‘gift’ deserves a better deal, but poor thing, it cannot ‘ask’ for it! But the point is, stretching of its linguistic limits has completely corrupted its core character. To the extent that, in the current milieu it is perfectly alright not only to order every gift horse or cow to open its mouth, but to do an exhaustive MRI too!
The larger provocation for ‘gift-wrapping’ this week’s column is, of course, the Deepavali season when gifts fly thick and fast. The immediate trigger is Vijay Mallya’s gift of a whiskey bottle apiece to his fellow parliamentarians in true spirit of the good times he claims to herald and the spirited furore his audacious act has ‘kick’ed up. So there you have it, the concept of gift, shaken and stirred and on the rocks, at rock-bottom, that is. But the plunge to the depths is a long term phenomenon. Bribes to babudom and politicos that make for peppy primetime viewing thanks to candid cameras have always passed muster under the nomenclature of Gift (anbalippu, in chaste Tamil). The judiciary is not immune too, despite attempts to push it under the contempt-carpet. Nor is the media exempt: Just a week back, when the cinema-media war erupted and was played out on the moral high ground, filmfolk, on the mat over prostitution charges, were quick to point out the rampant cover-for-coverage culture amidst journos. Indeed, all the three constitutional pillars of democracy and the unofficial fourth one liberally employ liquid cash and liquor crates as the most favoured illegal tender of Gift.
But the greater malaise is the national weakness for gifts. There is a marked mass vulnerability to pampering that has been all too evident recently. While gifts are doubtless a part of the festival fervour, public passion for anything free is an endemic, round the calendar phenomenon. The penchant of the commoner for an add-on for every purchase even if it be poison has been the butt of jokes for decades. The buy-one get-one offers and several ponzi schemes still have takers amidst the greedy and gullible despite several disasters. But while unscrupulous businessmen and many fly-by-night finance companies exploited this chink in the public psyche to their profit in the past, it is now the turn of the politico to do the carpet-bagging. Elections these days are won on cash-for-vote formula. Rains are welcome and the resultant ruin, even more, for it means relief in hard currency. Bonuses to government staff are routinely described as ‘Deepavali gift’, ‘Pongal gift’ etc. In fact, every dole from the tax-payers’ collective pocket to some select tax-payers’ individual pockets is a ‘magnanimous’ State gift! And no matter if the giver and taker are the same, the political broker in power walks away with the honours, besides helping himself to a hefty gift for the ‘service’! Indeed, these gift horses come with many riders!
Incidentally, last week was dubbed the ‘Joy of Giving’ week. And there was quite a traffic of give and take. For instance, the nation honoured the Rs 64 crore Bofors gift cheque given two decades back to the first family’s favourite compatriot. India virtually ceded more territory to China as a gift for the latter’s 60-year celebrations. The nation’s nuclear options as well as environmental priorities had already been gifted away in international summits. For his part PM MSingh, who has made the most of Her Majesty’s benevolent gifts despite a bent spine, has been consistently gifting Pakistan, in and outside India, with clean chits and a clear conscience. Pak’s return gesture comes in the form of jihadis across the border or shielding terrorists within it’s. And there is this long standing beneficiary of Bharath’s famed tolerance: Afzal Guru continues to get the gift of life. And just to brush up, here in TN, K gifted himself a few awards, and gave the residue to some chosen ones. His gift of the gab has doubtless been quite a rewarding faculty, for self and family.
Really, every gift horse seems to be wagged by a tell-tale tail with a trail to some sinister motive. So, with the gift offers so tough to match, what can I, a poor writer offer as gift to the reader? Mere words, that can at best be a gift horse (or cow) with some cheek but no teeth? Or may be, some good wishes. Happy Deepavali!
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