Chennai: Caring and tending to the ill is not new to Gomathi (54). For, the resident of Gandhi Nagar, Adyar has taken care of her mother-in-law, an Alzheimer’s patient, for nine years.
It was during this period, that she realised the wants and needs of care-givers. She is now on a mission to spread awareness about the progressive health condition, and to take formal sessions for those taking care. She shares about her mission with News Today.
Q. How many years did you attend to your mother-in-law ?
A. She came to Chennai in 2006. From 2009, she developed Alzheimers. It reached its peak in 2012, when she exhibited violent behavior. The last four years have been challenging. She passed away at the age of 85, a few months ago.
Q. What are the things that care-givers need to keep in mind while tending to those with dementia or Alzheimers?
A. What I learnt is that we have to go with the patients flow. We cannot expect them to act according to us. We did try to explain things to her in the beginning but failed miserably. When she says that I haven’t had lunch, I have to agree with her. Initially, I would counter her. We had a tough time as she was diabetic too.
Q. So how did you cope with everything?
A. I had two support groups- SAND is a support group of care-givers by residents of Adyar and Besant Nagar. Being an informal group, we regularly met and have an active WhatsApp group. We exchanged our experiences and gave support to each other through sharing and learning. Then, I was part of an official support group by a doctor.
Q. How are you planning to take this forward?
A. I know how difficult it is for a care-giver. Statistically, these people die earlier than the patient due to immense burden, anxiety and tension. People are not aware of how to tackle the behavior of the patient. Firstly, accept the patient the way they are. Being a trainer, I conduct memory training classes for senior citizens and sessions on managing emotions for the ones providing support. We cannot educate the patient, but we can balance our life and offer help.
Gomathi can be reached at 97898 64633.