The name of the game is now horse trading. Surely, the horses are not going to relish their good name getting unfairly dragged into the dirty political muck being generated by our elected reps, but unfortunately it is well ‘neigh’ impossible for them to voice their protest.
Had it been possible, every horse in town would have loved to tell the world that horse-trading is a respectable business after all and if there is anything bad about it, the horses are not to blame, unlike the ‘MPs- trading’ in which the commodities themselves put up a price tag and beg to be bought. Of course, every horse would have also landed a good, hard kick on the nearest politician for bringing disrepute to their fraternity and making asses out of the voters.
But then a godforsaken worthy in the past had, for some strange reason, likened any kind of tough bargaining involving the political animals too to horse trading and the stigma has somehow stuck on through generations. Even the most modern dictionary still refers to horse-trading, rather innocuously, as a kind of shrewd bargaining and clever business dealing.
But today, the ambit of the phrase has expanded to include all sorts of shady, underhand dealings that involve sale or purchase of persons, body and soul, for a price.
A half-baked, hurried research has this to reveal on the origins of horse trading. In medieval feudal Britain, owning horses, besides being a necessity for commuting, was also a matter of pride and prestige for the Lord of the Manor. There were also, some lesser people who too owned horses and hence the breed of the horse mattered a lot as it signified the status of the owner.
Auctioning of horses was therefore a major event which involved tough and no-holds-barred bargaining, sometimes even before the real auction began. This was perhaps why the phrase attained notoriety, because the lord’s underlings would somehow ensure that their boss got the best horses for the lowest price at the ‘auction’. The pre-auction, behind-the- scene manoeuvrings would never see the light of day, even as the proud owners walked away with their prized acquisitions for a song.
Discerning readers would have observed that the horse itself was just a mute, innocent spectator and was never a party to the shrewd or shoddy dealings, depending on how you look at it. But then as we said earlier, with the advance of civilization, horse trading too has evolved over the years. We are not sure if horses are being auctioned today as in the medieval times, but what we can vouch for is the existence of a thriving market for human horses under the cloak of democracy.
And unlike the horses of yesteryear, the human horses of today are a vociferous lot and truly have a say in the bargain. And they cannot be so easily led by their noses as they have a mind of their own, at least when it comes to their survival. They are fully aware of their worth, especially in these troubled times of shifting political alignments when the demand for their consciences reaches a peak.
Come to think of it, it is quite striking that democracy has attained so much similarity to matters relating to horses. A hint was certainly there in the beginning itself, when the concept of ‘first past the post’ became the democratic mantra, both during elections as well as in Parliament. And with every party vying to pip the opponent to the post, be it by just the length of the nose or even a whisker, the horse business is indeed flourishing famously.
Consider the present scenario. The auction ring now contains about 540 horses. The one aspiring to lead the pack needs the backing of about 271 of those, so that a truly ‘stable’ government can be formed with the leader in the saddle. And going by the current arithmetic, quite a few horses will have to switch stables if anyone has to achieve that. And hence the rat race for the saleable human horses, with horse brokers and head hunters swinging into action accompanied by burgeoning money bags.
And in the resultant melee and the stampede of crisscrossing horses, it is the voter and his wishes that get trampled, but the elected horses seem to care less.
There is another detail too. If in the horse trading of yore, there was a premium on good breed, there are no such hassles these days. Democracy, being a great leveller, has ensured that once in the ring, absolute social justice prevails. The price for a horse is the same, whatever its caste, colour, creed or ideology is.
Though, for the sake of record, there are such classifications as secular horses and communal horses, these are absolutely mutable and the shift from one stable to another is as simple as a short trot across the floor of the ring. These modern human horses have scant respect or fear for the whip. It serves their horse sense well, too!
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